Sunday, January 23, 2011

Our Son - Teigon Elliot

We had a baby boy, on June 5, 2010, Teigon Elliot . What a joy! He is now 7 1/2 months and such a blessing in our lives. I might be biased, but I'm pretty sure that he is the cutest baby ever.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Amusing thoughts and lots of sayings

I totally forgot that I had written a blog and obviously never posted it. I was going to add or change something on it but didn't have the time right then so I saved it. It is interesting to me to find this now and remember what I was feeling about 7 months ago. I figured I would share it now just for fun.

Kellin and I have been married for almost 6 years. It has just been the two of us for a long time and adding a new one in to the mix will really change things. People keep telling us that. "Your life is about to change", some add "and it is for the better". We have been trying to have a child for 4 1/2 years. We have been wanting this change for a long time and know that it will be very different. We are enjoying our freedom now, like a few days ago we went out for coffee at nine and only got home after 1 am or quickly picking up and going to Stbh. for the weekend or a night without having to do much preparing. But we are definitely looking forward to the change this little one is going to bring to our lives.
In my last blog, I talked about a man that we met who founded an organization in Zambia called Seeds of Hope. We talked to him about some of the processes that he had to go through for his adoption through Zambia and we talked a bit about the education seminar.
We learnt in the seminar about some of the bonding issues and diseases they could have with adopted children, plus racial issues with intercountry adoption. It was about two years ago that we went to this seminar, and it is a good thing we have a huge binder of all the information that we learnt so that we can go back and read it all again when the time comes. But these things can only prepare you so far.
I liked the seminar and thought it was very helpful and Kellin and I often joked that all parents should have to go through a seminar to have children. But now that we are expecting our first baby, we feel so unprepared. People keep asking us if we are ready. And I tell them, "Yes, as much as we can be." I don't think any seminar could fully prepare you for the change it will be in our lives, because each baby is different. We don't feel totally unprepared, we have been around babies before, so it isn't all unfamiliar territory, but to be the soul providers is much different than aunt and uncle. I am trying to read all the information I can get my hands on and ask lots of questions. The same types of things that I did when our paperwork first got to Ethiopia. All the excitement and anticipation I had for our adoption, is now focused on our pregnancy, delivery, and taking the new baby home.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Renewed Anticipation

The last few months, I have kind of left our adoption on the back burner. I have been focusing on our new job, being in a new town and, mostly, expecting our first baby. So, not really knowing what to write about our adoption since I haven't really thought much about it, I didn't write anything. But this last week, I was talking to someone and found out that his parents had adopted 4 children from Ethiopia after having 2 biological. They were adopted as little children and are now in their teens. It brought up so many questions that I have about the mix in the family, how they adjusted, how they feel about not knowing their families and so many more for the parents and the kids. I also talked with a man who founded an organization called Seeds of Hope. It is in Zambia, Africa and he adopted two children from there and another from somewhere else. They have 5 biological children, plus three adopted and now they have 3 married and 5 teens at home. We got to talk to him a bit about adoption, but again I have so many questions.
Being able to talk to these people and see some pictures of these children has renewed again for me how much I want to adopt and I just know that it is from God. He has put it on our hearts, not just because we thought that we couldn't have children of our own, but because God has called us to this. We don't know how many children we will be able to have biologically, one or 4 or more, but we are still going to adopt and look forward to how God is going to fill our house with children.
We have decided on adopting twins and with seeing my little niece and nephew (twins) and having a friend that just had twin boys, makes it even more exciting. I don't know how long it will be before we get our children from Ethiopia. We tried to get pregnant for 4 1/2 years by the time this baby is born and we have now been in the adoption process for 2 years. It is all in God's timing, just like everything else has been, and until then we will be anticipating and expecting them.

Friday, February 5, 2010

A Page Turned

It has been a while again since I have blogged again. I haven't really known what to update about our adoption, it is still in the waiting process and will be put on hold once the baby is born.

Kellin and I have talked a lot since we got pregnant about the "page" that has been turned. Since we never thought that we would get pregnant, we had pretty much prepared ourselves for being parents through adoption. I had been working through feelings of never being able to experience being pregnant and all that goes with that, and though I don't know if I would have ever fully have dealt with that, I had peace about it at that time. I knew that I would be a mother one day and each day was getting me a little closer to getting our children. I think I have mentioned earlier about the experiences and people we have met through our infertility and been encouraged by others experiences and hopefully been able to encourage them.

And now we are in a different place. This may sound funny or weird, but it has been a hard transition. This is the very thing that we have dreamed about and wanted for four years together and for my whole life and yet I feel bad about it. Don't get me wrong, we are very thankful and this is such an amazing gift. But we are just overwhelmed and don't know why God blessed us with this and why are there so many others who can't get pregnant and don't get to experience parenthood.

It is hard to compare what we are feeling but the only example I can think of is this: It is like we had a disease of some kind, one that may or may not be cured. And in that experience we could identify with others who shared this same disease. Feel the same pain and know the uncertianty of it. Now it is like we have been cured of this disease, not knowing why we were cured and some others weren't. How do we give hope to others with infertility when we know people who have never been able to have children. We can't say "it will happen to you" or "it is in God's timing" because that may not be God's plan for their lives and we don't know or understand why. It isn't about deserving to be a parent or how good you would be or how much you want it. I don't know why God allowed us to get pregnant and why at this time and not 4 years ago or in another 4 years. I don't know if the people I know who are struggling with infertility will every have kids. I used to pray even more for them than I did for myself because I knew we have our adopted children coming to us. And I continue to pray often for them that they will be able to have children, probably even more now that I have experienced it.

If I could be in control of it, what would I do? I don't wish the pain of infertility on anyone, yet if it was harder for people to get pregnant and had to be a conscious choice, would we have more loving and caring parents. Who knows and I'm glad I don't make those decisions. I just have to remember that God's plan for our lives is good and even though we don't understand it, his plans are better than ours.Well, that is just some of my thoughts.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Meeting with our Social Worker

Like I mentioned in my last blog we are still planning on adopting. God has put it on our heart and we believe that is what God has called us to do. However, now that we are pregnant, it is going to look a little different.

At first, we hoped that we would be able to just continue the process like it is right now. We had anticipated that by next year Christmas we would have a referral and be able to pick them up next spring/summer. We knew that the province wanted us to wait a year between big events (like pregnancy) to adjust to our new situation, so this would work out perfectly. By that time, our baby would be about a year already, and although this would be very crazy, we still can't wait to bring home our children that we have been waiting for, for so long.

Last week we had a meeting with our social worker for our yearly update on our file. At the meeting, we found out that we can't adopt the way we originally planned too. We were going to adopt siblings, one 12 months or younger and one up to 4 years old. We found out that, not only do they want us to wait a year, they want a year between this child and any that we adopt. They also want to keep the birth order, so this baby has to be the oldest child because it is coming into our family first. What this all means is that the earliest we will be able to adopt is when this baby is about a year and a half and if we still want siblings, then we will adopt twins or we will have to wait a couple years longer.

For now, we haven't had to make any decisions, but we will have to make some tough decisions soon. We have to decide whether we want to adopt one at a time now, just twins, or still siblings like we had originally planned. We will also have to decide if we are going to continue to try and get pregnant again, if we are able to. If that happens before the adoptions, then it pushes everything back again and if we try after, we don't know if it will ever happen again.

So, although this is a very exciting time for us, we don't know when we will be able to get our adopted children. We will just have to continue to trust God. He gave us this miracle at this time and He's the only one who knows what the future is going to look like.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,"
declares the LORD.

"As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8,9

Monday, December 14, 2009


Well, it has been a long time since I have blogged, again. I just have so much I wanted to say and not sure how to put it all in, so I'm going to split it into two blogs or maybe 3.

The week before Thanksgiving, we found out that we were pregnant. Like I have mentioned in other blogs, we never thought we would ever be able to have biological children, so this was quite the surprise and our little miracle. We had no clue how far along we were because it had been over 2 months since my last period. I had been pretty regular for the 5 or 6 months before this, but because of the stress of moving and the changes in lifestyle, I figured that this had caused my irregularity. So when we found out, we could have been anywhere between 3-9 weeks along.

At our first doctors appointment, she wasn't able to find the heartbeat, but she said it could either be because we weren't far enough along or because my uterus was tilted backwards, which would make it harder to find. So she sent us for an ultrasound to find out how far along we were. We really didn't know what to expect at the ultrasound, but we figured we would at least leave with some information, like how far along we were. We were told nothing and we were scared that something was wrong. I tried to call my doctor to see if she had heard anything from the ultrasound technicians and she wasn't in the office because she was in the ER that day. She called me from there and told me the news. We were 7 1/2 weeks along and the baby was sitting too low, barely in the uterus, and if it didn't move up, we would most likely miscarry.

Well, after many tears, Kellin and I decided that we needed to tell people about it so that they could pray for us. We told our families and friends who had been praying for us for a long time and trusted God that everything would be okay. This was not an easy thing to do because we really didn't know what God's plan was for this. The day we found out, I opened my Bible to Isaiah and found the title "A Promise of the Lord's Protection" and I began to read Isaiah 54. After reading the first verse, I burst into tears and could hardly read further. It talks about a barren woman singing and shouting because you will have more children than others, make your house bigger to get ready. God is all-powerful so don't be afraid or disappointed and it ends with the Lord, my protector makes this promise. I just felt God's peace come over me and we just trusted him for the next two weeks while we waited for the next ultrasound.

Two days before our second ultrasound, I started bleeding, not a lot but we were nervous. My doctor told me to call her if I had any bleeding, so I called her on monday morning and they told me to come in for a needle because Kellin and I have opposite Rh factors. So we rushed to Steinbach and got the needle and the bleeding stopped almost right away. The next day we had our ultrasound and we were so nervous. Since last time we heard nothing, we didn't expect to find out much but we wanted to at least know that there was a heartbeat this time before we left. This time it was a very different experience. She told me how big our baby was measuring (1 inch) and what the heartbeat was (162 bpm) and Kellin was able to come in and she showed us our baby, where it had been sitting and why that was bad, and we got to see it's little heart beating. We left feeling so blessed and so excited that we started calling everyone who prayed for us and told them the good news.

We are now 15 weeks along and I am feeling good. I was blessed with no morning sickness, just very tired and that has been getting better since we started the 2nd trimester. It is still hard to believe that in 6 months we will be having a baby, when we thought we would never be able to, but we are very excited. Everyone has been asking us if we are still going to adopt, and the answer is yes, but I will save the update on that for the next blog, which will be coming soon.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

The Move

So, I had planned to do this update a long time ago but somehow just didn't get around to it. Well, we are living in Altona and you might be wondering how that happened. Kellin was laid off in Jan. and we both felt he should go back to school full time. Although I was only working part time and we just built a new house, that is exactly where we felt God calling us and we both had complete peace about it. We sold our house which was a huge blessing and moved in with my parents (another huge blessing)
With Kellin being only one course left to graduate plus his practicum, we felt that it was time for him to start applying for ministry positions. So for about 5 months he applied for at different churches and organizations and in the end it was between to Youth Pastor positions. It was very hard for us to know which is the one God was calling us to because both were really good. One of the determining factors was really our adoption and how the community would be able to accept these children of a different race.
In the end we chose Altona EMMC. We made our decision at the beginning of August and Kellin started Sept. 1. We had one month to find housing. Since we had already accepted a puppy and with working with youth, we wanted a three bedroom house and that is what we started praying for. The day after the church voted us in, we had a call from one of the members that he had a house with 3 bedrooms. Wow God is amazing.
So now we have been here for about a month and a half and we have met some great people. Still a lot of adjustments and we are really missing our family, friends and youth from back home. But God is taking care of us and he has been so good. Thankfully, we are only and hour and 10 minutes away from Steinbach and hour and a half away from Winnipeg so it isn't too far to see them often.
I am excited about what God is going to do in us and through us to have brought us to this new place.